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SMOKIE'S DAILY PIC OF THE DAY

chopdoc

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2WhiteWolves

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Psst, a little birdie told me that if you search for this image on tineye you can find a 1.9 MB wallpaper sized version. Anyone read Russian? ;)

BTW what happened to Smokie? Has not posted here in weeks...
Um, no thanks ! And, don't know what tineye is.
Don't speak Russian.

Yup, I've been wondering that myself.
 

OldBat

Member For 3 Years
Tineye is like a search engine for images, just add the dot com. Handy for finding larger or captionless version of pictures. Like Smokies watermarks (cough) Some use it to see who else is using their stuff... Was hoping to find discussion about it that might answer the who, where and why. Largest image is usually the original source.
 

gadget!

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Tineye is like a search engine for images, just add the dot com. Handy for finding larger or captionless version of pictures. Like Smokies watermarks (cough) Some use it to see who else is using their stuff... Was hoping to find discussion about it that might answer the who, where and why. Largest image is usually the original source.
Or there are several Android apps that will pretty much do the same thing.
I use Reverse Image Search.

Sent from a Galaxy far far away!
 

chopdoc

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Conversation between a Texan and Arkansan..

Texan: "That your dog?"

Arkansan: "Yup"

Texan: "Mind if I speak to him?'

Arkansan: "Dog don't talk.”

Texan: Hey dog, how's it going?"

Dog: "Doing all right."

Arkansan: (look of shock)

Texan: Is this your owner?" (Pointing at the Arkansan )

Dog: "Yep."

Texan: How's he treating you?"

Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the park once a week to play."

Arkansan: (Look of total disbelief!)

Texan: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"

Arkansan: "Horse don't talk.”

Texan: "Hey horse how's it going?"

Horse: "Cool."

Arkansan: (Extreme look of shock!)

Texan: "Is this your owner?" (Pointing to the Arkansan )

Horse: "Yep."

Texan: "How's he treating you?"

Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking, he rides me, brushes me down often and keeps me in a nice stable to protect me from the weather."

Arkansan: (Look of total amazement!)

Texan: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?

Arkansan: "That sheep's a fucking liar!!”
 

gadget!

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Mr. Smith worked out of town a lot, so to save money he often traveled by train.

On one trip he had turned in for the night and had just got comfortable in his sleeping berth when a female voice from the berth below his said, "Mr. Smith, I'm getting a bit cold, would you mind getting me another blanket?"

Mr. Smith replied, "I've got a better idea, how would you like to be Mrs. Smith for the night?"

She replied, "Oh Mr. Smith, I would really like that."

Mr. Smith replied, "OK, get up and get your own damn blanket then!"



Sent from a Galaxy far far away!
 

Jinx'd

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Mr. Smith worked out of town a lot, so to save money he often traveled by train.

On one trip he had turned in for the night and had just got comfortable in his sleeping berth when a female voice from the berth below his said, "Mr. Smith, I'm getting a bit cold, would you mind getting me another blanket?"

Mr. Smith replied, "I've got a better idea, how would you like to be Mrs. Smith for the night?"

She replied, "Oh Mr. Smith, I would really like that."

Mr. Smith replied, "OK, get up and get your own damn blanket then!"



Sent from a Galaxy far far away!

:giggle:
 

Jinx'd

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Most jokes have a 1 track mind that leads straight to the gutter.

that's what makes em so funny.

when I was a kid, me and my buddy were at his older bro's house hang'n out watching TV. some very mild porn came on.
so we're watching it. then the bro turned to me and said " hey, get your mind out of the gutter. so mine can swim by".
I busted out laughing !
 

Vape Fan

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Thank goodness its Monday
 

chopdoc

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I had tears rolling!
THIS IS AN ACTUAL CUSTOMER REVIEW FROM A MAN ON AMAZON.CO.UK

AFTER USING VEET HAIR REMOVAL CREAM FOR MEN.

After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly Rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly successful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits.
Being a bit of a romantic I thought I would do the deed on the missus's birthday as a bit if a treat.
I ordered it well in advance and working in the North Sea I considered myself a bit above some of the characters writing the previous reviews and wrote them off as soft office types...Oh my fellow sufferers how wrong I was.
I waited until the other half was tucked up in bed and after giving some vague hints about a special surprise I went down to the bathroom. Initially all went well and I applied the gel and stood waiting for something to happen. I didn' have long to wait.
At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head.
Religion hadn't featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the the destruction of the meat and two veg.
Struggling not to bite through my bottom lip I tried to wash the gel off in the sink and only succeeded in blocking the plughole with a mat of hair. Through the haze of tears I struggled out of the bathroom across the hall into the kitchen, by this time walking was not really possible and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in the hope of some form of cold relief.
I yanked the freezer drawer out and found a tub of ice cream, toe the lid off and positioned it under me.
The relief was fantastic but only temporary as it melted fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing returned. Due to the shape of the ice cream tub I hadn'nt managed to give the starfish any treatment and I groped around in the draw for something else as I was sure my vision was going to fail fairly soon.
I grabbed a bag of what I later found out was frozen sprouts and tore it open trying to be quiet as I did so. I took a handful of them and an tried in vain to clench some between the cheeks of my arse.
This was not doing the trick as some of the gel had found its way up the chutney channel and it felt like the space shuttle was running its engines behind me.
This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain.
The only solution my pain crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before. Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my arse while muttering arhhh ooooohhh that feels good ahhh Understandably this was a shock to her and she let out a scream and as I hadn'nt heard her come in it caused an involuntary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction.
I can understand that having a sprout fired against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasent the special surprise she was expecting and having to explain to the kids the next day what the strange hollow in the ice cream was didn't improve my status so to sum it up, VEET removes hair, dignity and self-respect.
 

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